I was raised by the Twisted Seniors, parents so virtuous that they always completed the paperwork-of-duty before permitting themselves to indulge in the biscuits-of-liberty, even when nobody was watching. (EDITED TO ADD: But see their response in the comments thread below. 🙂 ) Their lawn is tidy and their cutlery is arranged alphabetically*. Correspondence is dealt with in a timely manner. They are really very good at adulting; experts, in fact. To my knowledge, they have never once incurred a parking fine or been told off for dressing scruffily at work, both of which have happened to me. (To defend myself just a little, the boss doing the sartorial telling-off had been a professional model before she became a neuropsychologist, so her views on fashion and style were a tad more sophisticated than my own. That said, she was occasionally seen in a turquoise leather mini-skirt, so I’d like to stand up for my Doc Martens and ancient frayed skirts just a tiny bit. I can’t defend the parking tickets, though. Not any of them.)
But my parents laboured under the illusion that one day, I’d grow up and be an adult, just like them. I’m afraid that they were to be disappointed. In this case, the apple hasn’t just fallen far from the tree; it’s rolled under a hedge, crossed four lanes of traffic, negotiated a housing estate, and ended up in an entirely different county – one where people aren’t quite so good at adulting. One where houses are chaotic, bins are put out on the wrong day, and post isn’t necessarily opened in the same month in which it was received.
So is there a crochet/knitting-related point to this fable of filial failure? Well yes there is, as it so happens, and it relates to the Winter Braid hat and gloves I’ve been knitting with Yarnstories yarn.
The point is that a proper grown-up would, on finishing the knitting of these lovely items, dutifully wash and block them and then wait for some semi-decent light before attempting to photograph them. After all, they’re cabled, and so stitch definition is all. That’s what a proper grown-up would do. That’s what the Twisted Seniors would’ve done.
You can tell where this blog post is going, can’t you?
I finished the knitting. I leapt round the house squealing, thus frightening the neighbours, and I grabbed the camera and started snapping away, without the slightest consideration for blocking. Sorry. My stitch definition is not what it will be once these blighters are washed’n’blocked. But looooook!
The pattern, in case you’re thinking of knitting it, is an easy one for anyone who’s cabled before. My only gripe was that increases in the hat were in the form of m1, rather than kfb, which resulted in some rather unsightly holes. I assume that I’ve misunderstood something here, and missed some vital hole-avoiding point. EDITED TO ADD: See lovely helpful advice in comments thread below. I love knitters. 🙂
Would you like to see more of the yarn? As I’ve said before, I was sent this Yarnstories aran-weight as a free gift, though there was no condition whatsoever that I knit it or post about it or even mention it. Look!
The merino and baby alpaca is most definitely soft, and warm, and feels exceptionally gentle and hug-like on the skin. The twist isn’t as tight as some, so if you favour your yarn tightly-twisted and meaty, this might not be your favourite. But it makes for a gentle, light, yarn that is warm as toast.
Frankly, it was a joy to knit with, and now it’s a comfort to wear. And the ultimate compliment: the Toddler Twinnage have requested that I make mini versions for them.
* Not really: they’re organised, not odd.
NEXT TIME: GUEST POST FROM SELMA AT ECLECTICHOMELIFE.BLOGSPOT.CO.UK. Wa-hey!
Ahh dear me. I am giggling as I write this. You so put the rest of us to shame Phil. Just look at that top photograph, let’s not even mention the giraffe with glasses in the back ground, but look at you in your delicious cables, camera knitted strap and looking way too cool. What was the former model talking about. Who cares about adulating. You knit and you rock at it/
Missy's Crafty Mess says
Giggle snort!!! I often feel that way my. My mother would have a stroke over the kitty food currently spilt on my floor. I however just hobbled over it and when right back to my current project. The cats will clean up their own mess if hungry enough. *** love your hat and mitts and the color is fantastic. I love them!!!!
Love the colour, love the gloves and hat, love the giraffe 🙂 hehe x
Amazing cables, fab colour. Thanks for sharing. I empathise with you about being adult and doing the right thing. I’ve been knitting all day whilst trying to pretend that there isn’t a 3 foot high pile of ironing to do. Hey Ho.
Me again! I find if you knit through back of loop of the M1 stitch (made by lifting strand), you usually eliminate the “holey” effect. Hope this helps.
The Twisted Yarn says
THANK YOU!!!! Seriously, I assumed that M1 was always holey. Yes, that most definitely does help.
Roe's Cottage says
And thank you from me too! I have avoided patterns with M1 for the same reason… I’ll have to try your advice!
They’re looking good! As is Mr Giraffe. She wears leather mini skirts and you wear DMs – sounds like you need to give her fashion advice. And also some management tips on how you don’t tell off adults. Pfffttttt. On a more serious knitty note, if you twist the picked up stitch when you M1 you avoid the hole. Not knit into the obvious bit but the back – I hope that makes sense.
I prefer the M1 to a basic increase, because it usually looks smoother. The kfb has a tendency to make it look like I’ve thrown a purl stitch right in the middle of lovely stockinette!
BTW, your parents are exemplary. I think most of us are in your neck of the woods, down that lone cul-de-sac with pine needles clogging up the yard!
Your post proves, once and for all, that while being an adult might be socially acceptable, you know how to have FUN! The gloves look awesome (even if they are, well, you know . . .) and I cannot imagine how much fun you and the giraffe had. There ought to be a law!
Katie Writes Stuff says
When you’ve made something that looks that good, blocking is just a frustrating barrier between you and your enjoyment of said item! Plus, the photos look lovely and have a giraffe in them, too, which pretty much counts as a win in every way that matters.
Flip Coast Creations says
“Yarn that is warm as toast.” Makes me want to buy it, hug it, and have it join me for a nice breakfast.
But don’t put marmalade on it…
My mother once told me “Housework makes me happy!” Sadly, I took after my father, who cannot find his glasses without Mom’s help. Love the cables!
Love it! I must fail at adulthood, too…but through failures and mistakes, we learn…at least that’s what my Medical Terminology instructor told us shortly after we bombed our first quiz.. Thanks for the pretty purple knits. I needed to see those today;-) (P.S. I’ve considered myself successful enough at adulthood if all my bills get paid that month (and over half of them on time, at least, the important ones).
That giraffe is rock in’ lol nice job!!
Nice review of the yarn, thanks 🙂
I read a lovely face book post the other day – “If you haven’t grown up by the time you’re fifty, you don’t have to”. When I retired, having spent my professional life as a very “adult” psychiatric nurse, I realized that all that “adult” stuff was only on the surface, the child within comes closer to my reality as I age. That, by the way, is one of the joys of aging.
You are awesome!!!
And the giraffe too!!
Twisted Seniors would despair of me, I fear, having only filed my tax return fifty-seven minutes before the deadline! I would rather be doing things that make me happy (like making purple gloves and cuddling a giraffe) than “grown up” things like paperwork:)
Oh my gosh, the giraffe is wearing glasses! Such awesomeness 🙂
Lovely hat, fantastic gloves, amazing cables, brilliant giraffe. I approve very much if your style. My parents and I are all haphazard in our own ways, which works out just fine as long as there’s someone there to pick up the pieces and forgotten paperwork…
Love the knitting. The colour is yummy and the yarn looks so cuddly. I’m absolutely cracking up at your giraffe though. That last photo is priceless 😛
Thanks for fun narrative. It’s a joy to finish anything. The festive color you chose would make it too tempting for anyone to wait until after the blocking.
I think it’s perfect. 🙂
Gorgeous stuff – love that colour.
Who decides what adult means?
Mother Twisted says
Thank you, Daughter Twisted, for your kind words. But we really seem to have pulled the wool over your eyes (sorry!) if you think we’re organised. It’s just that if we don’t pay the bill or sort out the problem immediately then it never will get done and will languish for ever at the bottom of that pile of “must-read” magazines and papers. We just pretend to be adults and I still haven’t decided what I want to be when I grow up even athough I’m retired so don’t be fooled by the grey hair. You’re only taking after us and that is not at all disappointing.
I haven’t actually been told off for my standard of dress at work but one boss insisted on knowing the provenance of my outfits to make sure they didn’t come from suppliers using sweat-shop labour. A real dressing-down would have followed if I had. But we didn’t know about those parking tickets…..
Talking of wool, you put me to shame with the way you do things properly. What’s “blocking”? I’ve never blocked anything knitted for you, from your baby bootees to your ballet lesson wrap to the scarf that also served as a tree measuring device. But blocked or not, I’m looking forward to seeing the Toddler Twinnage in new winter cable hat and gloves.
You rocked it ~ being all adult-ey is sooo overrated.
jem arrowsmith says
Loving this! The hat and gloves are awesome – and you can’t go wrong with a safari themed photo shoot!
Blocking?? What’s blocking?? Are you supposed to do something to your knitting after it’s done, apart from jumping for joy and squealing??
Amy at love made my home says
I have been told off for my dress sense at work! But they told me off for pretty much everything including breathing… I love the picture of you in the beautiful hat!! The giraffe is so funny too!! It is an odd thing when you realise that your parents aren’t quite so perfect as you thought isn’t it! xx
Lucy Turner says
i second debgarrety , although i pick up the loop from behind (ie push left needle under from back to front), then knit through the front as normal. Pretty sure it’s the same difference, not going to admit how many years it took me to work this out… also, I think my children are ALL going to grow up before me , which occasionally worries me. But not that much… Nice gloves and hat for a non-adult though 😉
That’s how I do it now too… but it also took me years to figure out I was doing it wrong… and getting big holes. I couldn’t understand why it was called an “invisible” increase. 😉
This was great.
I think what you just told us explains a lot. Sounds like while your methodical parents were not looking, a team of travelers swapped your parents immaculate well behaved baby for you. Oh well…I guess you have certainly added nuance to their otherwise staid lives ;). Don’t look now Ms Twisted but that giraffe just photo-bombed the HECK out of your “Ta-DA” moment there ;). I was just about to type “I might give those gorgeous babies a go as our winter is starting to peek over the horizon” but then I read “Increases in the hat were in the form of m1 (M1?! Er…k = knit, p = purl m = er…M = …”M = a headache and is obviously part of some kind of algebra!” No “M” for moi!), rather than kfb (kfb?! k = knit with f + b on the end? Knit face book? Kentucky fried beef?! I am not cut out for this “cable” stuff…). Yeah, that giraffe is TOTALLY photo-bombing Ms Twisted.
Beautiful, I love them and the colour is great! Thank you for sharing x
Woollen Wildnerness says
This post has made me realise I don’t nearly have enough pictures of myself with sun glass wearing giraffes. This will go straight onto my bucket list. And beautiful mitts and hat of course!
Fab post…I don’t think ‘adults’ exist really, not in my world anyway. So agree with your mum, still don’t know what I want to be and my eldest is 36! lol 🙂
Does the giraffe get a beanie and gloves to go with the sunglasses and the scarf?
Many Bright Things says
I think managing to finish a knitting project without being distracted and starting another one makes you a pretty good adult. At least that’s what I keep telling myself…
The Twisted Yarn says
I hope you’re right….
Many Bright Things says
I’m sure it’s a much more important adult ‘life-skill’ than mere things like paying bills and doing housework. That’s what I’ll keep telling myself, as I just HAVE to finish knitting these gloves before doing the dusting…
Born To Organize says
I’m almost positive that the twisted seniors are incredibly proud of all you do: working, raising twins, keeping folks entertained via this blog and knitting. I’m in awe.
You’re quite adorable in the photo along with the giraffe. What fun.
My son loves giraffes!
The Twisted Yarn says
Giraffes are cool. 🙂 Your son has the good taste.
Ooooh… Awwwe… Hope you’ll get some snow for wearing those nice knits next year! My adult-self is happy to know you have such a cool giraffe buddy, while my inner-child is experiencing a bit of giraffe jealousy 😉 ♥ <3