In case you thought my promises of completing that insane project were sounding more hollow with each passing week year, I decided to show you some progress on the garden portion… which happens to be the final section. For those of you who haven’t been reading The Yarn since it was hand-copied on parchment by medieval serfs, this project is large, bonkers, furniture-related, mostly crochet, and I’m very excited about showing you what it’s eventually going to be. Not long now, my fine fibrous friends… And I mean it this time.
(‘I mean it this time,’ is a phrase so over-used in this house-full-of-children that it may yet be etched on my gravestone. Actually that’d be quite a cool thing to have on a gravestone. And I sincerely hope that someone will yarn-bomb my gravestone, too. May as well have some fun whilst you’re dead.)
Woah, two paragraphs in and already we’re wildly off-topic. Let’s get back to the crochet. Would you like a just-out-of-the-oven cookie and some green tea?
It was necessary to do some weeding to make room for all the new growth. Yes, that’s the depressing truth: even a crochet garden sometimes needs weeding. In the yarn garden as well as in the real garden, the precious seedlings you nurture from germination with love and bedtime stories end up misshapen and withered, whereas the weeds resist your every murderous attempt with a will to survive that is awe-inspiring.
Witness the slime-mould-like abomination that got out of hand. I swear that despite it being made of yarn, it was actually growing when my back was turned. I’ve ripped it out, but there are still a few hairy roots lying semi-dormant. I predict trouble. You think I’m joking? I’m not joking.
And planting my little fibrous plants is a lot like planting real plants. With needle and yarn, I try to settle them deeply into the yarny earth. The simplest plants to make are the fancy grasses. After planting, I separate the eight plies in every strand and cut them each to a slightly different length.
Leafy bushes and flowers take more work. This is valerian. (Yes I had to look up what it was called, too. But you didn’t come here for horticultural advice, did you? Oh, you did? Sorry, you’ve come to the wrong place. Try the third blog along on the left…)
And hostas. I know nowt about hostas, except that they have big showy leaves, so they’re fun to hook. (Leaf pattern is based on my pattern.) Yes, that’s a bit of twin in the background of the photo.
Oh, and d’you see this?
This is to be a squat little conifer-like bush. 101 frondy bits. (I aimed for 100, but got distracted and overshot.) Pattern (if you can call it that) for frondy bits at the bottom of this blog post, just in case you should ever find yourself in need of such a ridiculous thing. And here it is, all sewn into place:-
If you leave such things lying around here, some small portion of twinnage is bound to come along and spot opportunities for imaginative play. Apparently, the grass needs mowing:-
And as life imitates art (I use the word art very loosely here, don’t worry. I use the word life pretty loosely, too), I spotted some borders of annuals at the village pub that bear more than a passing resemblance to the ring of begonias in the crochet garden:-
Right, ’tis time to put the camera down and carry on hooking. Thank you for visiting, and happy knitting/hooking.
Oh, and don’t try this at home, folks. (Really, don’t.)
Pattern for frondy coniferous thingy:-
US crochet terms. I know this will bother some people – sorry.
Chain 3. Work 5 sc into middle chain – these will form the actual leaf. Then work a pair of slip stitches around the neck of the leaf to pinch and hold its stem to make a neat round leaf. Then chain 4. Work 5sc into the penultimate of those chains as the beginning of your next leaf. And so on… and on…
Oh, ho, ho my fine twisted friend – I’m glad I stopped by to see this. It is looking more fabulous than I ever imagined. My god though – the hours!!! It’s just as well you are still [relatively] young!! xo
This is an awesome project! I always enjoy reading your posts, plus I learn a few things. ?
Love the garden. I can use that pattern! I’ve been making a doll and have been thinking about what kind of hair she needs. This just might be it! Thanks. 🙂
I shan’t believe you until I see the finished project, you have let me down too many times in the past 😛
The garden on this project is fabulous. I’m waiting to see the finished whole!
To use an overused word…Awesome!
You mention ‘loosely based on art’ I’d say this IS ART. Phil it’s fabulous and time consuming so I won’t be copying any time soon but my I love it! Having followed it’s progress from conception and been privileged to have seen it in all it’s green glory, it’s only left for me to say I am bowled over by your creativity and twisted ambitious take on life. Don’t ever stop x
Wonderful, just like the real thing but tidier. So impressed.
WOW!!!!!…. Just WOW!!!!!!!!
I have lost my words – I admire your persistence… That’s amazing!
Love it!
Your project is looking fantastic, so much creativity and beauty rolled up into that project. I love your writing, it makes me laugh.
Hugs,
Meredith
You really should get a Nobel Prize for this bonkers project of yours!!
I just love it and can’t wait to see it finished.
I am in awe! It looks superb.
When you started dropping hints about this picture, I came up with a few pretty insane ideas of what you might be up to (I think one might have involved a real life sheep), now I am slowly starting to think it might be even more insane I have ever imagined. I can’t wait to finally get the full picture of it.
I can’t wait to see this finished!!
This project is so delightfully creative and clever. Do you mind if I repost it to my blog?
You’re very welcome to! Thank you for your kind words.
I think you are slowly and painstakingly producing your family heirloom. You have teased us mercilessly with images from go to (almost) whoa and we are almost as addicted to this project as you, obviously, are. To say “I can’t WAIT to see it in it’s entirety” is most probably the understatement of the century and one day, when you have ceased hooking inventive and wondrous yarny varieties of gardenesque, you are going to miss this project ;).
This is turning into a monster, isn’t it?? Can’t wait to see the finale. So nice that the twinnage took on the lawn mowing – train ’em young, I say.
This is so clever and beautiful. You’ve captured the essence of a real garden wondrously. When it’s all done, I would love to make an Animoto (slide show with music) of all the steps for you to use on your blog (if interested). It’s special in so many ways.
Sensational, amazing,… can’t think of the word that does this justice. It looks so real.
The word that does it justice is…. RIDICULOUS. But thank you for your kind words, as always.
The most amazing project this is. Perseverence is certainly one of your character traits, or is it madness? If madness it’s a good one. I wouldnät have the slightest clue how to make all these plants look so real, let alone make them in the first place. I am in awe.
Probably madness. Sigh. But thank you.
How on earth does one even start such a project! It reminds me of freeform crochet. Love it!
Thank you! Starting it was the easy part: it’s finishing it that’s proving rather challenging!
What stitch pattern did you use for the lawn? (Grass)
It all looks great!
Hmmm. (It was so long ago…) I seem to remember that it was called spider stitch. If you need to know more, I can dig out the pattern for the stitch tomorrow when it won’t involve going up and waking the twinnage. 🙂