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Don’t Try This At Home, Folks. (Also, We Have A Giveaway Winner.)

April 25, 2017 by The Twisted Yarn 23 Comments

(The Hiking Moose pattern is nearly done. Maybe next post…)

This knitting/crochet thing… it’s supposed to be fun, right? Yes? I just thought I’d check, because, y’know, well because of this:-

crochet rainbow

More on that abomination in a moment, but first of all we have a giveaway winner to announce. Remember this beauty?

Sereknity nikki van de car review

Thank you to the 225 of you who entered before the deadline, and I’m only sorry that there can’t be 225 prizes, because this is rather a splendid book. As usual, I numbered all the entries, then left it to the inscrutable folk at random.org to do the rest. The result of their hard work? ‘Tis here:-

So who is this shadowy individual? Why, it’s none other than MaryBeth Billington! Congratulations, MaryBeth! I’ll be in touch in order to arrange for your prize to be delivered. Meanwhile, a huge and hairy thank you to Running Press, for providing the prize for this competition.

Back to the yarn.

I was in a yarn shop the other day with a couple of good friends. Or at least, I thought they were good friends: this time last week I’d have sung their praises if you’d asked. So we were wandering the length of the shop, browsing and chatting. My eye fell on some novelty yarn:-

king cole tinsel novelty yarn

Can I assume that we all know about novelty yarn, yes? We know that whilst it may be enticingly pretty in the ball, it’s best left well alone and admired from afar – and preferably through inch-thick security glass, just to be on the safe side. Because whilst I think we can all agree that sanity is a good thing, the route to sanity most definitely does not lie in working with novelty yarn. I know all this, the friends I was with know all this. And yet…

I’m a bit of a sucker for a rainbow. “Wouldn’t that make a lovely knitted rainbow cushion?” I said. (It’s King Cole Tinsel Chunky, in case you’re wondering.)

Now if these two women had been real friends, they would have said, “No.” Or at least, “Yeah, but you’ll go insane trying to knit that stuff: leave it alone, you clueless fool.” That’s what a real friend would have said. But these two wicked enablers? I think their exact words were, “Oh wow! You’ve got to buy that. It’ll be brilliant!”

And yes, I should have known better myself, but I really do have a bit of a thing about rainbows, and don’t we all have our little lapses of judgement now and again?

king cole tinsel

I bought the yarn. Seven balls of the stuff. Mistake number one.

And I started to improvise a crocheted rainbow cushion cover. Mistake number two. With knitting, you do at least know where your stitches are, as long as you don’t drop any. But can you imagine trying to crochet this stuff? The yarn is called Tinsel for obvious reasons. You could pretty much just drape it round your Christmas tree and call the job done. But what’s good for Christmas trees isn’t so good for crochet.

Can you see those stitches? Me neither.

There were times, many times, when I resorted to stabbing my hook near-randomly into the morass, because I’d had enough of trying to work out what was stitch and what was extraneous fluff.

But due in no small part to bloody-mindedness and gin, I finished the hairy beast.

crochet rainbow cushion pillow

I probably ought to say that looking at it makes me smile at its cheerful colours. But mostly it makes me want to get different friends.* As it happens, one of the twinnage has fallen in love with the cushion anyway and has appropriated it for his own use. So I’m making another one. In knitting.

I was planning to write up the pattern in case any of you wanted to make one, but (i) I don’t actually want you to suffer that much, and inflicting this son-of-a-stitch on you would be an act of cruelty, and (ii) portions of the pattern would say things like, “Keep stitching until you’re somewhere vaguely near the end of the row.”

crochet rainbow cushion pillow

∗ Not really, of course.

Filed Under: Crochet Tagged With: crochet, cushion, king cole tinsel, knitting, novelty yarn, pillow, rainbow, tinsel yarn

« Moose
Free Crochet Pattern: The Hiking Moose Cowl »

Comments

  1. alicadabra says

    April 25, 2017 at 11:46 am

    It looks fabulous!

    But having now attempted to crochet with the fluffy stuff I bought (which, I must point out, you failed to stop ME from buying, despite it also being a stitch-visibility-nightmare), I can very much feel your pain and think that knitting the second one is definitely the way to go!

    Reply
  2. gladeridercrafts says

    April 25, 2017 at 11:49 am

    Oh wow, you’re braver than me! I don’t go near that stuff…it’s worse than black mohair in a dim room I swear!

    Reply
  3. quietwatercraft says

    April 25, 2017 at 11:51 am

    Sounds like you had a bit of an ordeal. It does look fab though!

    Reply
  4. sisterjoyous says

    April 25, 2017 at 12:02 pm

    Dear Twisted, you(r friends) are insane. But in such a good way :0).

    This is the only thing I’ve ever seen in novelty yarn that makes me think, ooh I want to make one of those … if you were indeed insane enough to make another (knitted) one, that is, I’m not at your advanced level of bonkers. Although I do like the idea of a pattern that just involves instructions for random stabbing …

    You twisted, twisted woman. Look what you’ve done. Off to ditch my virtual basket full of real yarn for some squeaky stuff to make this joyous creation! Thanks, as ever, for sharing the fun :0)

    Reply
  5. Rainbow Junkie says

    April 25, 2017 at 12:11 pm

    I used a similar sort of yarn to knit a Womble and it wasn’t as difficult as I thought it would be but crochet………..At least I now know not to try.

    Reply
  6. Ms Sue says

    April 25, 2017 at 1:18 pm

    I made a beard (as a gag gift) for my son to fasten onto a hat once. Never again! I tried knitting and it was a nightmare, so went back to crochet and did better. You may not have been able to know where you were hooking, but at least you knew you had the thread on the hook. It makes absolutely wonderful hats for chemo folks. I was the recipient of two of these – one in rainbow colors which always made me smile to see it, and another in mingled brown which looked a lot like real hair. They were so very soft and comforting to wear. The ladies from a local church earned extra stars in their crowns for knitting those!
    Your pillow looks amazing and would make me smile to see it – as long as I didn’t have to knit or crochet it.

    Reply
  7. J J says

    April 25, 2017 at 2:05 pm

    I found some of that in my the depths of one of my boxes. I had made hats one year. Darling Sis-In-Law had one loved it and wanted another . OMG why didn’t I learn! Feels so good when you stop,

    Reply
  8. Barbara says

    April 25, 2017 at 2:26 pm

    It should have a tag on it…”Don’t Attempt This At Home,” but it does look compelling and the design is good. Brave woman!

    Reply
  9. Joanne says

    April 25, 2017 at 2:29 pm

    You’re welcome!!!!!

    Reply
  10. knitigatingcircumstances says

    April 25, 2017 at 2:47 pm

    Oh, this brings back memories (nightmares?) of novelty yarn. I spent two summers teaching arts & crafts at a seniors’ home in the late 70s. I developed a strong aversion to nylon. (And an appreciation for good storytelling.)

    Reply
  11. Bridget Lawrence says

    April 25, 2017 at 3:17 pm

    Oh no i can’t believe you got further than one row. If I had been in the shop too I would of helped and said NO NO NO NO
    Lol but having said that it does look very pretty so well done 🙂
    Mum has knitted with it and loves her hedgehog but very clearly said she won’t be making another one. I crocheted what was left around the edge of a hexi cushion. I was gonna do more than one row but as you found out that’s hard going.
    Your cushion is very pretty 🙂

    Reply
  12. Yolanda Chavez Sherman says

    April 25, 2017 at 4:57 pm

    LOL You had me at son-of-a-stitch! I too have found myself in a situation of stabbing my way through a project. Lesson learned! But I also found that I could more easily use those fun yarns inTunisian crochet. So I haven’t completely abandoned them. 🙂

    Reply
  13. Tanya says

    April 25, 2017 at 6:18 pm

    Lovely, I almost categorically refuse to work with novelty yarn…I’ll likely “re-gift” it if it’s “gifted” to me. That being said, I have a feeling your friends had a good idea that if they’d said, “No,” you would have simply said, “I can make it work,” and bought said yarn anyway…I think you had that go for the novelty yarn look in your eyes;-)….and one of your twinnage loves it. (p.s. it’s okay not to make another;-)).

    Reply
  14. rachel says

    April 25, 2017 at 7:02 pm

    Damn, my smallest has just asked for a fluffy rainbow cushion for her 5th birthday. She hadn’t seen yours (should I show her? Probably not….) But this sort of coincidence, surely it’s a sign….amd I’ve got 22days to do it….
    Shall I?

    Reply
  15. Tinke says

    April 25, 2017 at 7:28 pm

    I so hate this yarn, same story here. Never again.

    Reply
  16. narf7 says

    April 25, 2017 at 7:35 pm

    I got suckered in by a winter sale of oddments. Should have realised that the reason that there was SO much of this stuff left in a bin at a very popular yarn store going for 20c (your equivalent of 10p) a ball was a warning sign but I grabbed a tonne of it and arrived home triumphant at my “bargain purchase”. After a harrowing crochet blanket that we shall NEVER speak of again after this post (and that Earl promptly ate a week after I finished it…) where I had to use senses that were never designed for humanity to use in the hooky arts and where I suddenly understood why those weird deep sea fish have those big dangly lights in front of their eyes and wondered why nature hadn’t provided them with big dangly magnifying glasses at the same time ‘OH nature you are a cruel mistress!’ I finally made it but I still have a large haul of this torturous yarn in a big bag on the top of my wardrobe. Occasionally it dangles itself longingly out of the bag and tries to entice me with it’s fluffy sirens song but my motto is ‘once bitten, twice shy’ and I was bitten all over by this sodding yarn. I feel for you Ms T and I think it’s time to buy your friends a rainbow of this ‘lovely’ yarn each as a Christmas present 😉

    Reply
  17. Kristie Cook says

    April 26, 2017 at 2:27 am

    Haha! I have a plethora of novelty yarn bought with a “friend” as well YEARS ago because it was “clearanced”. Guess what? Eventually she GIFTED her haul to me as well! I’ve found that mixing it with a regular yarn makes crocheting much easier. Of course stabbing at it until it looks finished is a perfectly acceptable solution too! Who will really know what’s going on with the stitches? They’ll just say “it’s so fluffy!” ?

    Reply
  18. nanacathy2 says

    April 26, 2017 at 6:53 am

    The good news is that knitting with this yarn is fine. I found it enormous fun and had to forcibly stop myself from just doing more and more. Not tried crocheting with it. But I have got some left over yarn, mmmm

    Reply
  19. Laurel says

    April 26, 2017 at 7:43 am

    I actually like that sort of yarn, but I have fond memories of learning how to use circular needles in making a hat. A fluffy, Monster’s Inc yarn colors hat that had a carrying yarn was the first project, a lovely red hat the second. The move from straight needles and seams to circular and no seams has been revolutionary for me. And in simply using a size or two smaller as the second needle at the top was the easy solution suggested by my LYS (now out of business, alas.)

    Reply
  20. Debbi says

    April 27, 2017 at 12:23 am

    I made a circular cat bed with eyelash yarn held with worsted. I know, what was I thinking? It was an epic pain but the cat loved it his entire life. My daughter had it cremated with him so he would go over the rainbow bridge with his bed. It was totally worth every wretched novelty yarn stitch in the thing.

    Reply
  21. MaryBeth says

    April 27, 2017 at 2:30 pm

    You made me laugh out loud. It’s a good way to start my day.
    Thank you for allowing me to enter your Sereknity giveaway. I am so excited that I won! I never win anything. I can’t wait to receive the book. Thank you, again.

    Reply
  22. aprettypotato says

    April 28, 2017 at 7:57 pm

    Urg I can’t even imagine how hard that was to work with! On the bright side though the finished cushion is wonderful!

    Reply
  23. Heather Toepfer says

    May 3, 2017 at 6:09 pm

    I have tried to crochet with that kind of yarn and it is super hard! I give you kuddos for making such a big project with that yarn!

    Reply

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Aug 16

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It's not often that my activities here and on my @the.twisted.garden page overlap, but sometimes you just need to crochet a hammock for your squash.

It`s not often that my activities here and on my @the.twisted.garden page overlap, but sometimes you just need to crochet a hammock for your squash. ...

221 20

thetwistedyarn

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Apr 23

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We popped down to the New Forest for the day. The twinnage loved it. There was, of course, some knitting. 
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#knittinginpublic #knittingandwalking #knitspo #knitspiration #novitaknits #strandedknitting #strandedcolourwork #strandedcolorwork #Fairisle #fairisleknitting #fairisledesign #fairislefriday #fairislecardigan #garn #strikkedilla #strikke #virkning

We popped down to the New Forest for the day. The twinnage loved it. There was, of course, some knitting.
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#knittinginpublic #knittingandwalking #knitspo #knitspiration #novitaknits #strandedknitting #strandedcolourwork #strandedcolorwork #Fairisle #fairisleknitting #fairisledesign #fairislefriday #fairislecardigan #garn #strikkedilla #strikke #virkning
...

272 4

thetwistedyarn

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Oct 31

Open
There's a new blog post in town. See link in bio or explore thetwistedyarn.com.

There`s a new blog post in town. See link in bio or explore thetwistedyarn.com. ...

157 5

thetwistedyarn

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May 24

Open
A yoke is taking shape. Yarn by @novitaknits .
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#fairisleknitting #fairisle #fairisleknitting #jacquardknit #strandedcolourwork #strandedcolorwork #strandedknitting #yoke #yokejumper #yokesweater #knittingtopdown

A yoke is taking shape. Yarn by @novitaknits .
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#fairisleknitting #fairisle #fairisleknitting #jacquardknit #strandedcolourwork #strandedcolorwork #strandedknitting #yoke #yokejumper #yokesweater #knittingtopdown
...

122 4

thetwistedyarn

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Apr 5

Open
The steeks are cut and it's beginning to look a lot like a cardigan (apart from the lack of sleeves, collar, button bands, buttons, and a really thorough blocking, but what's a few details between friends?) I'm excited that the knitted reality is coming out pretty much how I hoped when I created the design. Feel free to laugh at my hubris when it all goes wrong tomorrow...
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#knittersofinsta #knitspo #knitspiration #garn #strikkedilla #strikke #virkning #knitwear #knitdesigner #novitaknits #nevernotknitting #Fairisle #fairislefriday #fairislecardigan #fairisleknitting #strandedcolourwork #strandedcolorwork #strandedknitting

The steeks are cut and it`s beginning to look a lot like a cardigan (apart from the lack of sleeves, collar, button bands, buttons, and a really thorough blocking, but what`s a few details between friends?) I`m excited that the knitted reality is coming out pretty much how I hoped when I created the design. Feel free to laugh at my hubris when it all goes wrong tomorrow...
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#knittersofinsta #knitspo #knitspiration #garn #strikkedilla #strikke #virkning #knitwear #knitdesigner #novitaknits #nevernotknitting #Fairisle #fairislefriday #fairislecardigan #fairisleknitting #strandedcolourwork #strandedcolorwork #strandedknitting
...

415 19

thetwistedyarn

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Nov 9

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Working on the book, fuelled by green tea and optimism.

Working on the book, fuelled by green tea and optimism. ...

193 4

thetwistedyarn

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Mar 16

Open
There's a new blog post at thetwistedyarn.com (or see link in bio). It's a little different from normal, as it pays tribute to my recently deceased aunt. But don't worry, normal yarny shenanigans will resume next post. 
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#copingwithgrief #grief #funeral

There`s a new blog post at thetwistedyarn.com (or see link in bio). It`s a little different from normal, as it pays tribute to my recently deceased aunt. But don`t worry, normal yarny shenanigans will resume next post.
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#copingwithgrief #grief #funeral
...

148 8

thetwistedyarn

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Jul 5

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New blog post at thetwistedyarn.com,  or see linky in comments..

New blog post at thetwistedyarn.com, or see linky in comments.. ...

114 1

thetwistedyarn

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Jan 29

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There's a new blog post at thetwistedyarn.com, or see link in comments.

There`s a new blog post at thetwistedyarn.com, or see link in comments. ...

187 0

thetwistedyarn

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Mar 11

Open
Good morning, lovely people. Isn't knitting just the BEST distraction?
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#strandedcolourwork #strandedcolorwork #strandedknitting #fairisleknitting #Fairisle #knitdesigner #knitspo #stylecraftspecial #stylecraftspecialdk #knitspiration #fairislefriday #garn #strikke #virkning

Good morning, lovely people. Isn`t knitting just the BEST distraction?
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#strandedcolourwork #strandedcolorwork #strandedknitting #fairisleknitting #Fairisle #knitdesigner #knitspo #stylecraftspecial #stylecraftspecialdk #knitspiration #fairislefriday #garn #strikke #virkning
...

302 9

thetwistedyarn

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May 2

Open
I finished designing a thing. @novitaknits yarns are lush. 🙂
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#strandedcolourwork #strandedknitting #strandedcolorwork #fairisletechniques #fairislefriday #fairisledesign #knitdesigner #knittingdesigner #nevernotknitting #novitaknits #novita #garn #strikkedilla #strikke #virkning #knitspo #knitspiration

I finished designing a thing. @novitaknits yarns are lush. 🙂
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#strandedcolourwork #strandedknitting #strandedcolorwork #fairisletechniques #fairislefriday #fairisledesign #knitdesigner #knittingdesigner #nevernotknitting #novitaknits #novita #garn #strikkedilla #strikke #virkning #knitspo #knitspiration
...

352 48

thetwistedyarn

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Jan 15

Open
Mix of high-tech and low-tech in today's number-crunching.

Mix of high-tech and low-tech in today`s number-crunching. ...

165 10

thetwistedyarn

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Mar 5

Open
New blog post, right here: https://thetwistedyarn.com/2022/03/05/blue-and-yellow/

New blog post, right here: https://thetwistedyarn.com/2022/03/05/blue-and-yellow/ ...

174 4

thetwistedyarn

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Jan 14

Open
Uh-oh. #knittingwithcats @stylecraftyarns

Uh-oh. #knittingwithcats @stylecraftyarns ...

227 15

thetwistedyarn

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Apr 26

Open
Decent weather for a run. Yes I do occasionally put my knitting down. The colours of this view are a statement, too.
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#running #freedomforukraine

Decent weather for a run. Yes I do occasionally put my knitting down. The colours of this view are a statement, too.
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#running #freedomforukraine
...

206 4

thetwistedyarn

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Dec 31

Open
New blog post at thetwistedyarn.com,  or see link in bio.

New blog post at thetwistedyarn.com, or see link in bio. ...

266 6

thetwistedyarn

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May 27

Open
Fancy a new blog post? See link in bio or visit thetwistedyarn.com. @novitaknits

Fancy a new blog post? See link in bio or visit thetwistedyarn.com. @novitaknits ...

83 1

thetwistedyarn

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Sep 18

Open
Half-way through the dragonfly motif on my Äkäslompolo cardigan. Speedy progress on knitting due to annoyingly slow progress on surgery recovery. Grrr....
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#strikke #strikstrikstrik #knittersofig #knitspo #knitspiration #strandedcolourwork #strandedcolorwork #strandedknitting #fairislecardigan #fairisle #fairisleknitting #steek #steeking #novitaknits #novita #äkäslompolo #knitdesigner

Half-way through the dragonfly motif on my Äkäslompolo cardigan. Speedy progress on knitting due to annoyingly slow progress on surgery recovery. Grrr....
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#strikke #strikstrikstrik #knittersofig #knitspo #knitspiration #strandedcolourwork #strandedcolorwork #strandedknitting #fairislecardigan #fairisle #fairisleknitting #steek #steeking #novitaknits #novita #äkäslompolo #knitdesigner
...

253 13

thetwistedyarn

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Jan 23

Open
New blog post at thetwistedyarn.com (or see link in bio).

New blog post at thetwistedyarn.com (or see link in bio). ...

133 1

thetwistedyarn

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Oct 26

Open
This is going to sound like a paid advert, but I swear that it's not. I've just stumbled across a website called @YarnSub and it's awesome! You can enter the name of any yarn and it'll give you the best possible substitutions with a % match score based on gauge, texture, fibre, etc. See https://yarnsub.com and enjoy!

This is going to sound like a paid advert, but I swear that it`s not. I`ve just stumbled across a website called @YarnSub and it`s awesome! You can enter the name of any yarn and it`ll give you the best possible substitutions with a % match score based on gauge, texture, fibre, etc. See https://yarnsub.com and enjoy! ...

168 18

thetwistedyarn

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Aug 31

Open
New blog post at thetwistedyarn.com,  or see link in bio!

New blog post at thetwistedyarn.com, or see link in bio! ...

165 0

thetwistedyarn

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Jul 18

Open
There's a new blog post at thetwistedyarn.com! Link in bio. Hope you enjoy...
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#knittersofinsta #nevernotknitting #knittersofinstagram #dragonflies #knitdesigner #stylecrafthighlandheathers #strandedcolourwork #strandedcolorwork #strandedknitting #fairisleknitting #fairisle

There`s a new blog post at thetwistedyarn.com! Link in bio. Hope you enjoy...
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#knittersofinsta #nevernotknitting #knittersofinstagram #dragonflies #knitdesigner #stylecrafthighlandheathers #strandedcolourwork #strandedcolorwork #strandedknitting #fairisleknitting #fairisle
...

366 4

thetwistedyarn

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Aug 10

Open
Knitting and walking, with a view. 🙂
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#knittingandwalking #knitinpublic #knittinginpublic #stylecrafthighlandheathers #stylecraftyarns #stylecraftblogstars #knittingblogger #knittingdesigner

Knitting and walking, with a view. 🙂
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#knittingandwalking #knitinpublic #knittinginpublic #stylecrafthighlandheathers #stylecraftyarns #stylecraftblogstars #knittingblogger #knittingdesigner
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254 7

thetwistedyarn

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Jan 31

Open
Crunching the numbers. Crunch, crunch, crunch...
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@novitaknits #knitdesigner #knitspo #knitspiration #nevernotknitting #knittingblogger #novita #novitaknits

Crunching the numbers. Crunch, crunch, crunch...
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@novitaknits #knitdesigner #knitspo #knitspiration #nevernotknitting #knittingblogger #novita #novitaknits
...

103 3

thetwistedyarn

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Aug 3

Open
New blog post at thetwistedyarn.com (see link in bio). Includes happy times with fellow Stylecraft Blogstars.

New blog post at thetwistedyarn.com (see link in bio). Includes happy times with fellow Stylecraft Blogstars. ...

159 10

thetwistedyarn

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Jan 23

Open
My long-loved and dear friend @mary_megarry_number452 sent this card two years ago with many warm-hearted words inside. Little did either of us know that in addition to the knitting, the two black cats would also become a reality. Hope to see you soon, Mary. ❤ Artist is Dee Nickerson.

My long-loved and dear friend @mary_megarry_number452 sent this card two years ago with many warm-hearted words inside. Little did either of us know that in addition to the knitting, the two black cats would also become a reality. Hope to see you soon, Mary. ❤ Artist is Dee Nickerson. ...

333 4
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